When you’ve been dating the same guy for almost 50 years, it might be time for a break.

“Come on, B! Why are you so down? This is supposed to be a Party Cruise Ship, not Mopey McSadface’s Barge O’ Sighs!”

“I’m okay, Amy. I’m just… wanna be alone for a bit.”

“That doesn’t sound like a party to me! Say, I know what will make you feel better. How about we do some wild water sliding into the Poolcuzi? That’ll cheer you up? Then later, we can grab something to eat below deck at the Rotating Buffet before we dance the night away to fun lights and two disco songs! I know two songs is kind of limiting, but I’m sure it’ll put a smile on your face!”

“That’s okay. I think I may sit out here on the deck and watch the Dolphin play for a bit, then go back to my luxurious suite and go to bed. Thanks, anyway.”

“This… this is about ‘him’, isn’t it?”

“No. Yes. Maybe. I’m sorry. I know I said I wouldn’t do this, but I just miss him.”

“Of course, sweetie. It’s only natural. But you made the right choice. You both need a little distance if you’re going to truly be able to re-evaluate your relationship.”

“I should’ve called him or left him a note or something before I left. You know what? I’m gonna call him. I’ll call him and apologize for leaving like I did and…”

“No! Don’t you dare call him, B! That’s just what he wants. Let him be a little scared that you aren’t coming back. Maybe Mr. ‘I Can’t Seem To Commit After Decades” will finally realize what his problem is. Now, enough of this. We came here to have fun, and there’s a a Cruise Ship Horn just waiting to be used unnecessarily. Come on, B, let’s go party!”

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