- One eye of newt
- Two and one-quarter millimeters of yak hair
- Four fingers of hog tail, straightened
- A pinch of herring scale
- Three live goldfish
- A thimble of vole scat
- Some cotton
Combine first six ingredients in a bubbling cauldron atop neon green fire and set aside for later use not related to diapers.
Use cotton to make soft, ultra-absorbent and fragrance and lotion-free diapers without the petrochemical plastic outer cover.