Jake’s List Of Things Mommy Says I Have To Write Down And Remember:
24: Absorbent diapers are not portals to another dimension.
25: I should not try to scare my little sister by telling her she might fall through the magic portal in her diapers.
26: I should never ever open the window in Ella's room, even if she is only on the first floor.
26: I should not encourage her to go into Mommy's diaper bag and throw diapers out of the window by saying they have a small environmental footprint.
27: If Mommy asks me why there's a pile of diapers outside of Ella's window, I should not answer "I don't know, maybe she's grown up now."
28: The Seventh Generation Diapers has a lightweight core that uses less processed wood pulp, but not because a giant termite escaped from the military.
29: If Ella has a nightmare that makes Mommy have to get up in the middle of the night, I will not complain when she also wakes me up and makes me stay awake with her.
30: For the next two months I am no longer allowed to watch any of Dad's horror movie DVDs.
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