Really? A wooden rocking chair?
Are you just TRYING to be a walking stereotype, Grandpa?
I mean, is there a bigger cliche than getting the new parents a wooden rocking chair? Awww, I bet you had visions of Tracy gently rocking little Juliette as a perfect sunbeam warms them both gently. Jeez, you’re such a sap.
You can keep your splinter factory, gramps. I got us a DozyDotes Children’s Rocker Recliner.
Yeah, I know it’s too small for us. That’s because we’re not supposed to use it. My kid’s gonna rock herself to sleep. I don’t know about you, but I’ve got a JOB. I can’t be coming home at the drop of a hat just ‘cause my kid wants to be rocked.
Yeah, well you can call it terrible and borderline sadistic all you want, but it was your coddling of my generation that got us into the mess we’re in now. Kids need to be toughened up a little! And having her own little micro-suede-covered recliner to rock and clean up will do her some good. I wish it had a couple of pinch points to teach her the harsh realities of life a little sooner, but maybe I can break that stability bar so she’s got a chance of tipping over once in awhile.
I don’t care how many generations of our family sat in that stupid rocking chair. If you’re so desperate to get rid of the stupid thing then eBay it.
Man, who knew the “greatest generation” was so whiny?
Warranty: 90 Day Dozydotes Warranty on Frames & Mechanisms, 30 Day Dozydotes Warranty on Fabric
Condition: New
Features:
- Rocks or Reclines
- Durable micro-suede and cotton upholstery fabrics (Black recliner made of leather-like vinyl) both micro-suede and vinyl can be cleaned with a soft cloth and light, water base detergent
- Recommended for children ages 2 to 8 depending on the size of the child
- Weight capacity up to 100 lbs.
- Sturdy hardwood frame
- Steel reclining mechanisms – Mechanism has locking feature that only allows the recliner to recline after manually pulling the footrest approximately 1 inch. Helps to keep small children from reclining the chair accidentally
- Mechanism cover helps protect small fingers and hands from otherwise dangerous pinch points
- Overall chair dimensions: 27” high, 19.5” deep (32” deep when footrest is extended), 21” wide (approximate)
- Seat: 18” height from top of chair to top of cushion (13.5” from top of seat cushion to floor), 4” (cushion height), 14” width of cushion, and 14” depth of cushion
- Made in the USA
Additional Photos:
In the box:
(1) DozyDotes Child Rocker Recliner Chair (You Choose: Contemporary Pink-a-Dot, Brown Bomber, Hot Pink OR Black)
