“This be the strangest vessel these sea-faring eyes have ever seen. Yar.”

Hi there, Mr. Scary Pirate Captain Guy! It’s so AWESOME that you and your crew sailed up to our Party Cruise Ship! My friends and I were just saying how great it would be if some boys joined our little tropical fiesta out here in the middle of the ocean where no one would check on us for days!

Now I don’t mean to be rude, but you fellas sure look like you could use a little F-U-N fun! Well, come on aboard! You can get cleaned up in our luxurious suite below deck and then join us at the water slide. No swords, though, hee hee! And if you feel like resting your wave-weary bones, feel free to have a seat on the bed, fold-out cot, or one of our fancy dining chairs!

Oops! Looks like my first BFF-mate Stacy wants to have a word with me. You boys just make yourself comfortable next to the Poolcuzzi! And help yourself to whatever is in the mini-fridge, okay? Tee hee!

Have you set up the rotating buffet and laced the food with sleeping powder as I ordered, Stacy? Excellent work. Make sure our guests eat well. Once they’ve fallen unconscious, have the rest of the girls loot the ship of everything that isn’t nailed down, then chain these scurvy dogs to their own mast. They will rue the day they ever set eyes upon this Party Cruise Ship, dear friend.”

Golly! She says she can’t wait to dance, dance, DANCE the night away some sweet disco tunes around the mirrored ball, but you can’t dance on an empty stomach. Now, who’s ready for shrimp cocktails? Yay!

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