No, you're not seeing things. Out of our
desperate attempt to be rich love for giving you options, we've added a little something extra for today. Come on in and check it out!
SWM - Single White Mummy - seeks handsome and aristocratic vampire lord for friendship and passing the time. Also for telling the time. Must have clock embedded in your tummy and backlit LCD screen. NO FRANKENSTEINS!!!
Must be fully posable and glow-in-the-dark. Snooze function not required but certainly will be a plus. If you're super durable poly-carbonate and nickel/PVC free, you might just be the vampire this mummy is seeking! Stop by my sphinx crypt and let's do coffee!
PS: I like cats, hieroglyphs and sun gods and hate garlic, running water, and people who don't invite strangers in when they materialize on the balcony from inside a strangely intelligent mist. Call me soon!