Time To Pick Up A Few Childish Things
Eliminate the risk of strangers promising candy! Now your kid can BE the stranger with candy!
When you think children, do you think toys? Or clothing? Or maybe you think "How can I best get out of here before these little monsters ruin my eight thousand dollar suit" instead?
Well, whatever you're thinking, stop it. STOP IT. You've got to FOCUS or else you might miss an amazing deal! Because what you're looking at here is a free-flowing river of discounts breaking through the dam of retail and flowing in a torrent of cheapitude right at your face and wallet.
Face it, at these prices, you can't afford NOT to have a kid. Except for that whole part where they'll expect you to buy them a car and pay for their college. Just kinda overlook that for now, okay? We're trying to make a point here.