The Future Is Now
Encourage your kids to learn while they're young. Then one day you can demand all the credit.
"And to you, the class of 2040, I say 'well done!'" Up on the stage, the college president moved her tassel from right to left. The crowd, including Ella, did the same. Tim hugged Michelle tight.
The president went on. "Some of you are graduating early, with honors. Some of you are here late in life. Some of you are getting your Bachelor's, your Master's, your Doctorate. Only one thing is for sure. You wouldn't be here without those Sid the Science Kid DVDs your father bought you."
Michelle looked lovingly at Tim. A few people turned to look at his face and smile. Tim tried to stay humble.
"Because, new graduates, without those five Sid the Science Kid DVDs, you never would have started down the path to real education. Never mind how your mothers said they were a distraction, it was your fathers who knew best, and, technically, loved you the most."
Michelle shrugged. She couldn't help but agree. Tim patted her shoulder to let her know he forgave her.
"Graduates, as you go forth to your lucrative careers, carrying your knowledge about animals, the five senses, exercise, charts and machines, be aware that it was not this school that educated you, but rather, your fathers. I implore you, class of 2040, stand up and applaud the man who bought you those Sid the Science Kid DVDs! The man who made you the geniuses that you are! Stand up and pay homage to... TIM!"
"TIM!" the crowd roared as one. "TIM! TIM! TIM! TIM!"
"Tim! Tim! Tim!" called Michelle as she shook her husband's arm. Tim leaned up from the couch cushion. Across the room, Ella was happily watching her Sid the Science Kid DVDs.
"Sorry, honey," Tim said as he sat up. "I guess I fell asleep for a second there."