Seventh Generation Diapers

by wootbot

The Wisest Of All

Diapers are a) an ancient tool. b) a modern marvel. c) a tool in the war against parents. d) all of the above at once.

THE SMALL BOOK OF ELLA'S WISDOM

 

as recorded by Ella, in crayon

(in her own secret language no one else can read)

1: While learning to use the potty, avail yourself of any helpful circumstances you may discover along the way.

2: If such circumstances are favorable, such as in the case of Seventh Generation Diapers, continue to wear them until such time as they are no longer vital.

3: If all points on the Seventh Generation Diapers are secure, there will be no leaks, and no one will hold you out and say "Uh-oh!" and take you to another room where you cannot observe and plot.

4: If you attempt to master the potty, everyone will condemn you for accidents. Therefore is it not simpler to use diapers with a small eco-footprint, especially when they are available until Stage 5?

5: There is no instance of a youngster benefiting from early toilet training.

6: The skillful parent knows that no wagon should be filled twice. That's a metaphor for disposable diapers, in case I'm being too subtle.

7: With diapers, let your object be to move from dirty to clean, with the help of a family member who has no choice but to help you, lest they suffer more than you will.

8: Knowledge can only be obtained from others; therefore, spend as little time as possible away from them. Bathrooms are for one, diapers require two.

Michelle flipped through the little folded pamphlet and cooed at her daughter. "Ella! Are you practicing letters? These almost look like something a person could read! I'm so proud at how fast you're coming along, honey! Uh-oh, smells like someone needs a change..."