Take a Deep Breath and Count to 3
Here's a lesson for ya, kid. Don't get in line behind The Count at the grocery store unless you want to be there all day.
Listen, you want to hang with Elmo and Zoe and check out their die-cut board book and read along CD? Have at it. You think it'd be pretty rad to rock some ABC flash cards and learn to identify upper and lowercase letters? I'm not gonna stop you.
But say tonight you make a quick stop at the market for a juice box, and you happen to see The Count, and he's paying in all pennies as he's prone to do, do yourself a favor and head for the self-checkout instead.
Don't get me wrong. I've got nothing against The Count. He's a smart dude. His wipe-off workbook can really help you master some basic math skills. I'm just saying he's a little long-winded.
You'd think that counting to $1.53 wouldn't take that long. But when you take into consideration his weird, compulsive need to say "Ah Ah Ah" after each number, it really adds up … no pun intended.
I suppose you could say that the real lesson in that instance is patience. Just keep that in mind when you're four cents and 12 "Ah Ah Ahs" from whacking him upside the head with a pack of Rolos.