If you don't buy your children this craft bundle they'll probably grow up to be the worst thing ever... a Congressperson.
Can you stand that? Can you stand the shame of turning on your television and seeing YOUR CHILD coming up with excuses for a dumb law that nobody likes? Can you stand for seeing your flesh and blood ruin this great nation with their ridiculous compromises and six-martini lunch meetings? If not, you NEED to buy this giant craft bundle so your children have something to keep them busy so they don't accidentally watch C-SPAN by mistake.
Remember, your child wants to do things that will get your goat. And right now (based on poll ratings) nothing gets your goat more than Congress. Truthfully, every second without this craft bundle is one second closer to hearing your child's name in front of the words "is in the pocket of corporate lobbyist groups" and who wants that? Better to have glitter glue, alphabet stickers, brush pens, craft sticks, twist crayon sets and more! That way your kids can create and dream instead of, you know, smashing, ruining and destroying.
Just remember, if they draw themselves padding a bill with unwanted pork spending, you send them to their room! Immediately!