Ideal Decorate a Dream House

by wootbot


Sure, it's the thought that counts. But it's the lack of thought and careful planning that opens you up to the world of man-eating cartoon horses.

Ella squinted with distain at the Ideal Decorate a Dream House in the shop window. "Ideal? Ideal for who?" she thought to herself.

"Sure. It has over six rooms and stands over 3-feet tall. And yeah, it features over 200 different components and props like tables, chairs, beds, a stove, a kitchen sink, toys, fabrics and more. But does it have a drawbridge? Nope. Or secret passages? Nuh uh. What about a panic room with water- and airtight 3-foot-thick solid titanium doors and enough emergency supplies to survive for three months? Nada. But It does have dual hinged doors that just open right up to showcase all of your home's decor and also massive security weaknesses."

"Little girls who don't have to fear invasion from a band of murderous My Little Ponies," thought Ella. "That's who this is ideal for. Little girls who enjoy things like interior design with paint, stencils, stamps and stickers. Little girls who have dolls under 7" tall dressed in sparkly and frilly party attire instead of camouflage military fatigues."

Ella was certain that in some preschool circles, this Dream House would indeed be considered "ideal." But not in her world. Not now. Not ever. She had plans. Responsibilities. Important duties to attend to. Maybe some other little girl would like it better.