Early Learning Bundle!

by wootbot


Teach your children well! But not too well, because that takes a lot of time and money. Something like this will be a nice balance.

Education is a hard thing in childhood. If your kid is too smart, they'll be teased. If they're not smart enough, they'll be teased. If they're just right, they'll still be teased, but they'll be smart enough to know it's not about how smart they are. That's the goal. The sweet spot.

To find this spot is simple. Get your child some educational materials, like the ones here and now. Flash cards let 'em learn numbers and letters, and all the sounds of the vowels. Your kid will need to know that so they can fire back insults. "That's not how you make a soft g! Ha ha! YOU'RE the dumb one!" And suddenly, the bully becomes the bullied.

But that's not all! With some wipe-clean workbooks and 48-Page activity books, your child will master basic skills such as shapes and math, which will allow them to run simple cons that can earn pocket change they can then use to hire other kids to protect them. Face it, when you can buy the loyalty of upperclassmen, nobody's going to mess with you.

A true education mixes book learning with street smarts. See? Bundles are important!